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Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Blurry visions and a damp keyboard

It's been almost a year and yet,
this dark abyss within does not disappear
they say time heals all
but in the darkness
i welcome loneliness
in the image of you

Try as i might to deny
fill this emptiness
the crushing void remains
dragging along with it
this tormented soul

For every smile you see
every laughter you hear
constructs of fallacious intent
to maintain this tough exterior
when the bolts holding it
have but waned and decayed

They say when a person turns your life over
this person saves you from the terrible end awaiting
yet in cheating life
irony begets
life cheats you
into further despair

In existing to prove
to become someone of equal caliber
i've come so far
yet
i'm still so far away from you

Who i am today
belongs entirely to you
but yet you who shaped
is now a distance away

Guess I was foolish
pursuing to fill this hole you've created
this hole that eats me up inside
destruction within this
seemingly tough exterior
built upon lies

I'm no longer sure,
whether you feel the same way as i towards you.
I'm no longer sure,
of myself this one person whose existence belong to you
I'm no longer sure
of what i'm doing

Yet amidst this bleak uncertainty
I do know, my heart still belongs to you.

I'm pretty much still the same guy you first met
a little bit more intelligent
a little bit more mature
a little bit more sorrowful

Your heart is like a labyrinth
I cannot fathom
lost at every twist and turn
and yet this amazing being of yours
tore down the walls
made the hurt disappear.

I guess i still love you
even though i complain about how prissy you've become
I still love you
I want to meet the girl beneath once again

I know asking of this is impossible
but i guess trying never hurt.
Would you leave him?
for this wretched soul you have saved
This soul who so deeply loves you.

Maybe love is not a word good enough
its been so long
three years to be exact
and yet i cannot imagine a life
without you in it.

Pants, I really really love you.
But i can't bring myself to tell you
for you are happy now
and doing so would crush your romance
this romance that pains me.

I guess i'm a liar through and through

| Into My Thoughts @ 9:15 PM |