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Thursday, May 7, 2009


My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I lost my dad when i was 11
I should have been beside him
but i was not

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I took the loss hardest
6 years has passed by
everyone got over it
except me

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
6 years I dissapear
Consumed into darkness
The impending darkness

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I love the carpark
I find solitude and peace there
My heart is in a mess
not twisted I assure

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I lost too many people
and im going to loose more
the world is naught but cruel

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I prayed to god asking for a miracle
those that belonged in a childs mind
I asked for some company
or some assurance
Nothing

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I have a step father and a step sister
I feel no connection
No matter how nice they can be
I feel
nothing

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I used to love going to church
But now I don't get the point anymore
I go there to find peace
And everytime i call
The phone rings endlessly

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I am empty
I am cold
6 years
on going

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I grew up too fast
Never enjoyed much of anything
that smile you see in those pictures
what smiles?

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
In my darkest hour I asked
No one replied
I lived two years with a lie
a lie so that my family
would be at peace

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
today again I asked
today again I saw nothing
I got through everything by myself
but in the times when my body refuses
again i see
a whole lot of desolation

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I have been charging ahead for something
something in which I do no know

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
Their life is perfect
mine is not
thank you me

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I feel empty
Like a worm eats through an apple
the hole you see
multiplied

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I am a sad soul
My parents are happy
My siblings are happy
Me I am
Neutral

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I am?
I never knew

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
god enjoys his humour
I was made this way
I did not go astray
God you have your laugh
I'll entertain

My name is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I dont know what to believe in anymore
Maybe everything was made up
I dont know
Made up to console to answer the
Unanswered questions

My name Is Jonathan
I am 17 this year
I hate my life
Do you?
(but no matter what you still made me smile)
and you still do
-Desolation, Destruction, Derailment, Depravation
Condemned

| Into My Thoughts @ 7:45 PM |